You Can’t Please All Of The People All Of The Time!
What a shocker, right?
Seriously, we all know that not everyone is going to be happy with us and with our decisions, yet we’re still surprised when it happens to us.
You know what I mean, you give, you give and still… it never seems to be enough. You know why that is, because some people are givers and some people just live to take.
Sad but true.
In the past few days, I’ve met some “real takers” and instead of getting upset about it, I tried to figure out a way to cut ties with them, as quickly as possible. Why would I choose to have people who always “want something from me and usually for free” in my life?
Look, I can be as generous as the next person, usually, even more so. I give of my time, my expertise, I give of items or food, if someone should require what I have, more than I do. You get the drift and chances are, you’re probably the same way.
I learned a long time ago, don’t get upset with the taker, just get them out of your life and do it quick or else you risk them taking more, than you really wanted to give!
Someone I once knew, called the takers, “spiritual vampires” and you know what, it’s a pretty on point (pardon the pun) title.
Once someone has revealed to you exactly who they are, it’s now up to you to either, move forward with your eyes wide open, into some kind of a relationship with this person or cut bait and run! I choose to not associate with takers, I don’t require that kind of headache and at my age, who needs it?
Here’s a few key characteristics of a professional “taker.”
- They give very little, if anything at all and they expect you to give a whole bunch.
- The more you give, the more they want.
- When you don’t give enough, they play the victim and make you the bad guy.
- If you have something that they think they deserve more than you, say, peace of mind, abundance, love, for example, they’ll find a way to destroy it or take it away from you.
- The world owes them.
- It’s someone else’s fault, whatever It is, they will not take personal responsibility for it.
- They’re never wrong and always right.
You won’t change a taker…
I know, that’s contradictory to much of my teachings however, I’ve found through personal experience and through many years of coaching some really “giving” clients that takers, keep on taking, and they generally don’t want to admit to the taking, nor do they have a desire to change.
It’s important that you set healthy boundaries for anyone and everyone in your life!
Heck, even today, I had to say no to my four year old grandson because he would have run me ragged, otherwise. If I had allowed my sweet but demanding four year old grandbaby to run roughshod over me, he would have and he would have thought that it was acceptable behavior. I reminded him that although Nana loves him dearly, she’s not going to allow him to behave as an ungrateful brat, no matter how cute he may be and guess what… he was perfectly happy to change his behavior and we had a lovely day.
Have you ever heard that “we teach people how to treat us?” It’s true. If you’re willing to be mistreated and you don’t put a stop to it immediately, the silent message is, “it’s okay to treat me badly and I’ll still be here tomorrow so you can do it to me again.”
How do you set healthy boundaries? You work on you! Yep, don’t try and change someone else, get good at changing and improving you!
Work on your self esteem, take care of you mentally, physically and spiritually. Practice self love, I touched on this in a couple of my previous blog post, like this one and here in my ebook “Creating Your Vision.”
You Can’t Please All Of The People All Of The Time
– So don’t even bother trying.
When you love you, you’re comfortable saying no to the things and people that don’t have a win/win agenda.
Your tolerance level for nonsense, is pretty low because you know and truly believe, “you deserve better!” 🙂