It’s time to release.. and learn how to forgive and forget.
Has there ever been a time in your life that someone has wronged you, treated you unfairly or hurt your feelings? I know most of you will say, “of course, who hasn’t had that type of experience at some point in time?” Have you held grudges against the people whom you felt treated you unjust or have you let it all go? I ask because it is interesting and a little disturbing to me when I hear adults place blame on their circumstances and past experiences and make them justifications as to why they are or aren’t further along in life.
Please don’t take me the wrong way, I don’t condone mistreating anyone and I don’t think that it’s okay to victimize others. The act itself isn’t what I’m questioning, instead, I am questioning the after effect of the experience and I’m wondering if it’s being used as a tool to hold anger and resentment within you. I admit that I’ve never been a holder of grudges. I’ve been hurt, disappointed and broken hearted however I think I was born the eternal optimist because I simply don’t let those things get me down. And if they do bother me, they don’t get me down for long.
I recently read an article in a woman’s magazine about how anger and the unwillingness to forgive is a contributing factor to all types of diseases, from cancer to heart disease. Wow, when we hold a grudge or dwell on another person with anger and resentment…it hurts us even more! We become toxic from the inside out and the toxic thoughts have a long term, detrimental effect on our health and well being. Not anywhere in the article that I read did it say that our angry thoughts cause the person we’re angry at to suffer, instead our angry thoughts cause us to suffer even more. Okay, it’s time to let it go and move on with your life!
Confucius said, “To be wronged is nothing unless you continue to remember it”
Take this statement and repeat it several times each day upon waking in the morning and before falling asleep at night. “I forgive ______________ for ________________ and I forgive myself for holding this anger for so long.” “Today I am free from all anger and hurt.”
Have you forgiven yourself for past mistakes? I don’t hold grudges directed towards others but I have been known to get very upset with myself for making a mistake. Can you relate? I have gotten so irritated with me for making bad decisions in love, business, and in life. I am constantly reminding myself that the errors were all part of the lessons and the journey which has led me to this wonderful place in my life.
If you find your anger is directed at yourself, take this statement and repeat it as often as possible. “I forgive myself for _________________ and I now release the anger and the pain associated with that experience.” “My mistakes are my lessons by which I grow from today and always.”
A great book to read on the power of forgiveness is by Louise Hay and is titled, You Can Heal Your Life. This book is a classic on the correlation between anger and poor mental and physical health. She offers some wonderful affirmations and exercises to release the anger or pain associated with a life experience or painful action caused by another person or even by you.
I love the saying, “have attitudes of gratitude to make your life brighter and happier!”
Over the years I have been angry and disappointed by an incident or by something that didn’t happen for me however years later I see the beauty of the situation and I am grateful for it. For instance, when I first decided to become a full time entrepreneur I struggled and I went flat broke (emotionally and physically) in pursuit of my goals. It was a painful and humbling experience for me to go through and yet, years later I look back with gratitude for those lean years of hardship. If I hadn’t struggled, I wouldn’t be the successful life coach that I am today. How would I identify with my frustrated coaching clients had I breezed right through and created an abundant business right out of the gate?
Sometimes when we’re in the moment of the challenge, it doesn’t appear to be anything we could possibly be grateful for and yet, if we can hold on for a couple of years…the gift is often revealed. Another for instance is a situation of the heart which occurred for me several years ago. I loved, I lost and I was hurt from the experience. It took me awhile to get over that heartbreak and now I look back and I could just kiss the man who broke my heart! Thank God he was a dud and moved on because shortly after him, I met my now fiancé John and trust me, he was worth the wait! Had I not gone through the darkness, I may never have experienced the bright sunshine I live in today.
Let go of the past and live in the now. Now is where the living is…not yesterday or even tomorrow. Now is the time to forgive, forget, be grateful and live your life. Look back with compassion on any situations which caused you pain. Did any good come of the past experience or can you see the gift of the incident today? Are you better, stronger, and a more determined person because of your life mistakes?
Will you let the past go so that you may be healthier, happier and more successful today?
You deserve the joy of forgiveness. If it’s painful and making you sick…forget about it! (Use strong Italian accent when saying that last sentence)
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I look forward to sharing again with you very soon. By the way, if you haven’t find out why you deserve to own The Smart Girl’s Guide To Home Business Success. Click here to find out more.
Until we meet again – I believe in you!