Eureka – Success would eventually be mine! But then something very strange occurred; people within my industry would point at me and call me “a success story.” I had the beautiful homes, luxury cars and fat bank account however I didn’t really “feel” successful. I mean come on, I still hadn’t achieved that clear-skinned-perfect complexion yet, my teeth were a bit crooked, and I ran three to five miles daily, just to stay lean and slim. I was in a relationship with a nice man but life was certainly not all “bliss.” Success was supposed to mean “no more worries,” it was, in my mind, supposed to make me feel differently, I was surely going to become euphoric, and to feel a bit more like “the cats meow.” No, this isn’t what “success” was supposed to feel like; after all, I still had troubles, albeit they weren’t necessarily the same type of troubles as I’d had when I was flat broke but they were still troubles. My imaginings had lead me to believe, once I had achieved an annual income of five, six and seven figures…my life would then be perfect! Maybe it was time for me to go back to reading some of my self improvement books. Did everybody feel differently once they had achieved a certain level of accomplishment, or like me, did they stare into the mirror and think, “I’m the exact same person that I’ve always been,” “except now people treat me differently but I know, in so many ways, I am still the same, exact person?”

Success didn’t transform me or should I say, it didn’t change the way I felt about me. Ah ha, so this is one of the secrets of “feeling good about you,” no matter what occurs, you still have to feel good about you! I mean, I loved myself, I admired myself but I still felt slightly flawed and not quite “worthy” of my new-found abundance. The realization set in for me then; when you read quotes such as, “Success is an inside job,” they really do me “inside of self.” The world may or may not eventually look at you and smile for your accomplishments so you must smile and feel good about what you have accomplished yourself, “within self.” It was shortly after this realization set in for me that I decided to begin life coaching and sharing my experiences with others. Perhaps by sharing my experiences, I would be able to assist others over the internal roadblocks that we, so often, set up for ourselves.

We pursue an illusive “feeling of success” but for many, it never comes. I once was a business coach to a top female heart surgeon, she is considered to be brilliant and top-rated in her field and yet, she confided in me, she often times, feels a fraud. She doesn’t consider herself to be brilliant, smart or a gifted physician, she still perceives herself to be “not smart enough.” Her greatest fear is in being “found out,” she worries that others will discover that she isn’t as bright or exceptional as they think she is and she dreads the day the detection takes place. Even though, the truth is, this female surgeon truly is rated as one of the best of the best in America and she saves thousands of lives every year! Success didn’t alter her insecurities, “within self,” she felt broken, short on talents and lived with the self-proclaimed certainty that it was only a matter of time, before others saw her this way too.

No one can give you a feeling of self love, and for many of us, it doesn’t come naturally so we must commit to finding ways to reinforce the good feelings when we have them.

• Surround yourself with supportive people whom empower and uplift you
• Keep a daily or weekly journal and document your personal/business progress
• Read back through your journal and use it as a reminder of just how far you have come
• Continue to develop yourself and utilize tools, people and methods you have found to be empowering to you.
• Accept that Mom, Dad and people from your past meant well but they may have been wrong about you and your so-called short comings
• Compliment yourself daily, and keep those positive affirmations close at hand
• Take pride in yourself, practice good personal grooming and self care
• Read the books, attend the workshops on improving YOU
• When you make a mistake, learn from it and move on, don’t continue to beat yourself up
• Seek coaching and ongoing counseling when required
• Avoid alcohol and recreational drugs if you have challenges with them
• Take care to maintain a healthy body weight, exercise daily and feel better
• Focus on accomplishing your goals and not on being perfect
• When you can improve you, do it. If there is something about you that can’t be changed, learn to accept it
• Practice giving yourself permission to shine and say yes whenever possible

The moral of the story is this; always work on “self.” Chase the dreams, develop the business and become a raging, prosperous, success story for others to admire and strive to duplicate but never, ever, stop working on you! Read the books, attend the workshops, the seminars and do the personal coaching, counseling, whatever it takes, in order for you to accomplish a sense of “self love.”

Peace of mind only comes from within and success truly is in “the eyes of the beholder!”

In the early nineteen-ninety’s, I attended a success seminar, hosted by a very wealthy and successful businessman. He made a few recommendations of things one could do, in the pursuit, of ones own personal success. He suggested becoming an avid self help, leadership and personal development reader. This gentleman also recommended that the person seeking success, should read biographies on successful, accomplished people. He made a bold statement about the advantages of avoiding the media, television and to only read the first page or two of a newspaper. His advice was that mainstream media, was controlled and manipulated and that the information was designed to keep the populous, as a whole, broken, distrusting and frightened of life.

I often wonder, how many people sitting in that audience, over two thousand of us, actually applied any or all of this businessman’s advice? My desire for success and prosperity was very high. The man speaking up on the stage had nicer clothes than me, a beautiful home (s) which he had showcased up on a huge movie screen for the audience because he had wanted to “inspire” us. He had fast cars, luxurious, hand-tailored suits and glowing, wrinkle-free skin. In a nutshell, he appeared to have the prosperous, happy lifestyle that is reserved exclusively for the rich and famous. I desired, with all my might, to have what he had, so I began applying all of the “success principles” he doled out to us, like candy that day! Firstly, the television went out the door and when my pre-teen son screamed bloody murder about the missing television set, I repeated what I had heard at the seminar, “The electronic income reducer” was only  sabotaging my efforts to achieve more success out of life… it had to go! Already an avid reader, I began reading more books, faster! I careened through each self help “how to” guide as though my very life depended on it. I picked up books from the library at rapid, break-necked speed and took copious notes which I kept in a three ring binder by my bedside so that it would be readily available for me to jot down any cash induced nuggets of information, I might glean from my latest read.

Perhaps, some would say, that I took the successful gentleman’s advice too “literally” and they would probably be correct but I so very much desired a different, better life; If he had told me to sell all of my furniture, quit my job and use what little money I had to start a business of my own…I would have done it! Oh wait, he did tell me to do all of those things and I did and guess what…life got much worse before it got better!

Thank goodness for my self help, successful-people-biographies because they kept me going, when all I wanted to do was bury my head, hide my shame and embarrassment for literally burning all of my bridges and diving head first into the frightening, unfamiliar entrepreneur world!  This getting rich stuff was becoming more difficult with each passing day. My friends and family thought I was crazy and I was beginning to think I was too. Then IT happened, my daily affirmations became more believable to me. Unexpected gifts began coming my way and eventually, a little cash trickled in. My business started to take off; the more I believed in myself, the more my confidence soared and the more other people began believing in me too!

Follow your heart’s desires, always! Make the decision now to live your life purposefully, no matter who or what obstacles come onto your pathway. When you decide to live a purpose driven life…magic happens!

As I reflect on the past few years, I know that I was on purpose for my life, every step of the way. There were challenges (big ones) and rewards too. I learned and grew from the challenges, while expressing gratitude for the rewards in my life. Expressing gratitude causes good things to multiply.

Gratitude is the key to ongoing abundance, divine assistance and continued success. Take a moment to make a gratitude list right now! Think of all you have to be grateful for and ask that each blessing multiply because of your loving appreciation and acceptance of it.

Are you in business for yourself? Express gratitude for this wonderful opportunity. Do you have love in your life? Rejoice in the ability to love and be loved in return. Are you living in a free Country? God bless that freedom daily. Heal old hurts and wounds by thanking your Creator for guiding you through, to this present moment here, now, today!

Remember to give thanks to you for your courage, persistence and on-going faith in the future and in your dreams!

I appreciate each of you and I look forward to serving you to the best of my ability, through out 2012 and beyond!

CHARISMA

Charisma is a difficult quality to define. Someone with charisma has the ability to draw people to them, through their actions, body language and verbal communication skills. Charisma is about having good energy and about having confidence, not arrogance.

People with charisma are easy to pick out of a crowd because they’re the ones with lots of people around them. They’re usually in the center of the crowd! When you have charisma, the world is your happy playground.

Charismatic people have the ability to allow people to like them. They’re very comfortable with themselves and feel great wearing their own skin and in sharing themselves with the world. Most home based business endeavors are a “people building business” and when you develop charisma, people will flock to be associated with you.

Arthur Burger once said, “Character is something that is caught, not taught.” One way to catch or build up your character is by placing yourself in an environment that will assist you to develop desirable thoughts, motives and good habits.

I can’t think of a better environment than self-employment for developing outstanding character. What a tremendous opportunity for every individual involved in this industry to literally place themselves in a position to develop desirable thoughts.

From the moment a new business owner signs on the dotted line and walks out of a meeting or presentation with new products to use and retail, they are literally beginning a character-building journey.

Desirable thoughts, motives and habits are the “name of the game” to your home business success!

ABUNDANCE

The way of abundance is simple; you either are or you aren’t abundant. You’re either heading for lack or heading for abundance. There is no middle of the road on this subject. It’s truly black or white. The person with a “prosperity consciousness” and the person with a “poverty consciousness” are not walking on the same “mental” street, so to speak.

I used to say, “I never win anything.” Once I became aware of what my words were drawing to me I began to say, “I am a winner, I always win everything I go for!” Guess what gang, within one week of changing my thoughts, I suddenly won a $50.00 gift certificate for groceries, at a time when I desperately required money to buy food for my son, Mother and I.

That same week I won a turkey after entering a free drawing! Was this an accident? No way! I had applied for several credit cards during this same period of time, and I had been turned down by all of them. However, by miracle of miracles (or my thoughts) I received a credit card within a month of all of my other abundant surprises! I had $5.00 to my name when that credit card arrived! Needless to say I was so happy and I had to admit, that no matter what my future held I was going to make a conscious decision to draw only good things to myself by managing my mind!

If this set of examples doesn’t at least begin to encourage you that you do have complete control over your current situation, I don’t know what will.

Master your mind and you master your world!

We’ve all heard it said, “Time is your most valo09uable asset” and I doubt any of us would disagree with that statement because it just rings true. There are 365 days in each year and 24 hours in every single day; why is it that some people are extremely productive with the time all of us have allotted to us and others simply squander the minutes away as if there is a never ending supply? And at the risk of pointing out the obvious, once squandered, the time is never returned to us, it’s gone forever!

First and foremost, it’s important to have a healthy respect for our time and personal value because without “self respect,” it would be easy to be taken advantage of and spend time doing things that is not in our own best interest. When you value you, it shows in your personal and business habits and others follow your example; business associates and friends/family will respect you as well.

In the twelve years that I’ve been offering personal and business coaching, the number one time waster for the majority of my clients is procrastination. Let’s face it, procrastination is a stall tactic and it seems to rear its ugly head more times than not, especially for the home-based business owner.

The most efficient method for increasing productivity and reducing procrastination is to have a goal or daily “to do” list and a set, reasonable time limit in which to accomplish the chore. Do the most important task first and better yet, do the things you really don’t want to do first, so that once they’re done, you can cross them off of the list. Believe me, it feels so exhilarating to not only complete a chore but to have done the thing you really didn’t want to do … feels great!

The first step is a doosie and you’re the only one who can take it! Being more productive requires A-C-T-I-O-N; taking the first step in the right direction is half the battle because often times, the paralysis of analysis sets in and the first step is never taken. Something exciting occurs when you do take the initiative to “act”: action creates energy and a feeling of well-being for a positive movement in the right direction. Continuous, productive action = Increased Results!

Social media has become a way of life for many of us and we would be at a complete loss without logging into Facebook, Twitter or Pinterest on a daily, if not hourly basis. Granted, the social media sites can be a great resource for business connections and communication with friends/family members; however, these sites can be both a blessing and a curse to the self-employed entrepreneur. It’s so easy to get caught up with the social aspect of the networking websites and to lose track of time and next thing you know, hours have been wasted on non-productive activity and another day is lost – never to be returned or replaced. If you’re planning to stay active on the social media sites for both business and pleasure then be sure to set time limits for yourself and stick to them.

De-clutter your work space and increase your productivity. Clutter on a desk or in your work (creative) space can be an energy drain and cause you to waste a tremendous amount of time searching for the lost document, note or whatever. A good policy to implement is if you must touch the document more than once, make a file for it so that the next time you require it, it’s easy to find and no time is wasted locating it. If the document isn’t important enough to touch again, throw it away and the same holds true for your email inbox…if at all possible, delete the file or the message so as not to clutter or cause distractions.

Sometimes you have to say no. If your family and friends are accustomed to coming to you when a fundraiser, community or family event is taking place because they “just know” that you’ll organize it, it might be time to begin saying no if taking on the project is going to interfere with your productivity. It’s great to be able to offer your time and expertise, especially when it’s for a good cause, but if the volunteer work is interfering with your ability to create business results of your own, get comfortable with saying no from time to time. It’s not about being mean; it’s about you taking care of you and your life/business first…then everyone else!

The general rule of thumb in business is, “you’re either in politics or you’re in production.” Avoid, at all cost, the temptation to get involved in office politics. Nothing kills productivity for an entire organization quicker than to have everyone bickering, pointing fingers and talking negatively about each other. It goes without saying, politics in the workplace is the kiss of death for efficiency and team synergy.

Continue to focus on your goals and don’t forget to celebrate the small achievements towards them that you accomplish every single day.